|A perfect day as envisioned by Midjourney|
and also my nightmare
Sunday, August 27, 2023
Saturday, August 12, 2023
What I try to tell my kids
what I wish I could tell myself, is this:
pay attention to the glimmers where you feel most free to be
where you draw yourself in, what you're doing when
you forget the day the week the planet and just do it
the thing you're doing - that's it, that's something
you can learn to see
like a formula or constellation
build your life around them
center them and focus from that hub
learn the landscape of others on your hunt
don't be deterred because you can't see what job will own you
don't be deterred when doubted by your friends
don't be deterred by skipping common milestones
don't be deterred because you can't see around the bend
just centre what calls you, what you melt into, what feels like purpose
get curious, play, learn the soft edges and sharp curves
imbibe what it takes to embolden your nerve
find and learn the tools that let you shape and express back
into the world.
and if you can avoid the longing for things you might never have wanted if you knew what it cost to get them
and focus on staying with what matters to your heart
a living will follow the art you inevitably build through
pure curious intent
a living as secure as, and maybe more secure than, an eroding traditional path
and a life, oh, a life that's full of what you love most, most of the time;
if you must strive, strive for sublime.
Friday, August 11, 2023
Dear Pretty Lady,
In all the hype you are probably one of the smaller parts of the Drag Race machine but for me, from the first moment, you're the biggest. I love you because I found you so weirdly pretentiously annoying until, like a veil lifted, I saw you DOING you, and you do you so precisely. I love you because you go from inscrutably icy to suddenly vulnerable and back again in a blink, so quick most people probably miss it and have no idea why they love you. I love you because you are blunt and scary but not scary because you are never, never unkind, and your words are gifts you give even when it's hard. But mostly I love you because from the moment I saw you I thought I saw HER again, my best-friend-on-our-way-back-again, until she died from a deadly combination of bipolar and the patriarchy's hatred for "the crazy bitch." She's been gone for two years and I still don't believe she left me here. But now, there's you - the way you hold your mouth, your brash vulgarity, your gorgeously knowing how gorgeous you are, your next-to-brutal honesty that feels like a rough caress, your several laughs, your bold gestures, your affection, your flattered smile. You embody so much of what made her, her. You conjure her. You help me conjure her back, for a moment, as if she made it to where she could have been, if only, just where you are.
Thank you for showing up out loud, and giving me a taste of who you are that wafts a scent of her my way. I painted a painting for you, if you want, I hope you're one of the 8000 people in the world who might like it. I think she would have gotten it too.
with love and gratitude.
CM Simard 1971-2021
Wednesday, August 9, 2023
|The Inbetween (CAI)|
If you just look at it logically, leaving feelings aside -
leaving feelings aside?
just look at the ground, ignore the sky?
Feelings are a huge part of who we are. Separating from our instincts, looking only at logic and not valuing the information of feeling, is what prevented us from making decisions that would benefit all life on the planet at every step through every generation that tried it, to the tip of destruction, yet we still worship at the alter of logic, or instead, ignore logic to worship at the alter of feelings; either way we fail fail fail fail to see the ground and the sky and EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN WHICH IS WHERE WE LIVE.
But then, I see it, so you see it, so everyone sees it and still here in the inbetween we are told look up or look down but don't see what's in front of our eyes.
It's time to take the gun out of life - Badly Drawn Boy https://youtu.be/qYdLoCt3tRs
Monday, August 7, 2023
|Help Yourself (CAI with Midjourney 2023)|
When a person offers help it's natural they
imagine they know what will help;
imagine what the person receiving help will feel when they are properly
and from that deceiving entitlement
to a nebulous outcome they may feel
by any deviant end to their well-intentioned, oh-so-generous